Talk About It Tuesday: Oral Sex- How Much Is Fair Play?

Hello, America!
A cliche says that all is fair in love and war. But does that same rule apply in the bedroom? There are men in positions of power that love to be cuckholded and dominated and spanked behind closed doors, while there are 25 year old women pretending to be younger babysitters sneaking to take care of the man of the house instead of the children. That's pretty much only in porn. But in relationships, a mate's goals are to please the other mate. Oral sex plays a massive role in pleasure for most couples. I've known a number of couples that have a chief complaint about the fair play of the lip and tongue action below the belly button.

I have had male partners of my own that can be downright selfish when it comes to giving the clitoris a long kiss goodnight, and I've had female partners that would rather taste the forbidden fruit than to use her lover's mouth as a cup for her own juices. I love to please my mate if they are deemed worthy, and I'm also a huge fan of receiving as well. But it's not my sex life that's in question. There are relationships falling to pieces right now because of the lack of communication about 'sexpectations' and 'sinhibitions'. Why is that?

If a woman craves to the taste of her lover's meatstick then she should be allowed to do so. And if a man wants to take a dive in her muff, then by all means let the man dive! Who are you to stop them? And a better question is WHY WOULD YOU??

I wanna know, America, if your partner would rather give than receive oral sex, how much is fair play? And how do you communicate to him or her that you would love to please them in that way as well as enjoy the work he or she puts into you? Let's talk about it!

Signing off until next week- A. Wiley

Talk About It Tuesday

Is Masturbation Offensive in a Monogomous Relationship?

Hello, America!

  I often get questioned about my obvious love for sex and self-gratification. And I know plenty of other men and women that also indulge in themselves more often than not. But so many questions about masturbation come from inquiring minds wondering if it's perfectly normal or at least minimally acceptable once you've found a mate to replace the toys, intense lubes, videos, and hand action.

  Personally, I think it's natural and healthy to please yourself, regardless if your in a relationship or not. I pleasure myself before sex as foreplay, during sex for a more heightened moan-gasm, and after to calm me down. Now, to many, that may be a bit excessive. But to me, that's the norm. Every person is different, but I'm sure everyone that says that masturbation is gross, or even repulsive, is a closet freak that beats off  the moment they think no one's watching.

  A man won't hide the fact that he enjoys the the thrill of his throbbing member between his fingers while watching Nina Hartley suck and blow until she's covered in a stranger's jism. But a woman will defend her precious honor that she will NEVER do such a thing to herself. Why is this? And when women encounter a man enjoying himself with a stroke of his own hand, she's so offended. I don't get it. If my man likes to please himself with his hands, then he is so allowed to do it. I'd rather he choke his chicken than screw a chickenhead.

  Now, there are quite a few men in the crevices of the universe that get upset to see their women get off on all their own. They tend to feel left out, and in my mind, the men are simply being selfish and controlling. I'm sure with enough communication and understanding, a relationship can thrive with masturbation present. Hell, you can even indulge in mutual masturbation if the mood is right. I suggest that some you prudes try it. It may seem a bit odd at first, but if you are pleasing yourself right, things will get easier, the room a bit steamier, and the sex more satisfying. Believe me, I know.

  My questions to you, America: How much is too much in a relationship? And why should there even be a limit?

  I'm signing off until next week, so let's talk about it!

                                                               -A. Wiley

The Last Exorcism-- My Thoughts

Reverend Cotton Marcus lives in Baton Rouge, Louisiana with his wife and son. Raised as an evangelical pastor by his father, he has been accustomed to performing exorcisms on "possessed" individuals. He ventures on a journey with a camera crew documenting his every move.  The film was cleverly done in the style of The Blair Witch Project meets Paranormal Activity, with a budget of 1.8 million. It grossed $17.4million, earning it the #2 spot (behind Takers with an allstar cast)

Now this movie has been getting mixed reviews by the public, I had the pleasure of going to see this flick ALONE and I must say I enjoyed the movie. I am a huge fan of horror movies & almost always will go to the theaters to see anything that's "dubbed" horror.  There were moments in this film where I was lost and had no clue what was going on. Once I thought I realized what the plot was getting to, it changed once more. Very clever and done nicely. I don't think the purpose of the movie was to describe or give you all the answers, you're supposed to leave the theaters wondering what happened and decide for yourself what to believe. Much like what Cotton & Louis had to do. I HOPE there will be a sequel, i can see a few ways it could be introduced, i would just hope that the same small budget & lack of detail in trailer approach is kept.

If you like films that iron out everything for you, put them out on the table and have you saying "Oh, I KNEW it! I thought that was going to happen" then this is NOT the film for you. If you need a breath of fresh air and soemthing that will challenge your mental plane, I would suggest you stay away from conversations about this movie, go see it for yourself and develop your own thesis.

Leave asking: What do I believe?

Have you ever been confronted with a Millitant Christian?

In the year 2010, we are facing a time where everyone is seeking refuge. With hollywoods constant depiction of "2012", increased  violence & weather patterns shocking the nation what else is there left to do? We must always remember to beware of those who wear masks. Everything that we are confronted with is not right, it is up to us to decide what our spiritual side connects with. What am I talking about?

. Some christians, and some not so christians use this as an opportunity to prey upon the weak minded and easily persuaded. Religion happens to be one of the rudest conversations to get involved in (along with sexuality & politics.) It is so wasy to offend someone in mid conversation. On a recent visit to a coffee shop, I overheard a random conversation between two strangers (one male & one female)  pertaining to a local church. The male bashed the church that the female attended calling it "watered down, dry & boring", the female fired back wanting to know what was so dry about her worship or how she recieved her praise?

Now I find things wrong here. I am not the holiest person on earth, nor am I the most sinful (though I may be close to it) I do know that judging someone elses worship and praise is never a good idea in the eyes of the lord.  In recent years, Christianity has become a very combative commencement of people. You are either in or you're the devil (much like the Jehovah witnesses they detest)

My question today is: Have you ever been confronted with one of these Millitant Christians? If so, describe your encounter!

Takers took the #1 spot...

The film follows a group of professional bank robbers Michael Ealy, Chris Brown, Hayden Christensen, Paul Walker, Idris Elba who specialize in spectacular robberies, as they are pulled into one last job by a recently paroled cohort (T.I) only to be pitted against a hard-boiled detective (Matt Dillon) and his partner (Jay Hernandez) who interrupt their heist. Dubbed the male version of Set It Off, over the weekend the film snatched the number one spot (beating out Eli Roth's The Last Exorcism) earning $20,512,304. Also, the films attendance was 50% greater than similiar films such as Dead Presidents, ATL & Street Kings.

In my opinion, the film could have been just a few more minutes longer. I would have liked to see more action scenes and a little bit more character devolpment. Due to the lack of that, the film, at times felt like a sequel. Chris Brown did an awesome job and wowed me with his spider-man performance. While TI's acting & dialouge seemed a bit questionable at times, I do think he will devlop into a quite impressive actor. Just look at LL Cool J!

If you have not had a chance to check this movie out, it DOES live up to all the hype surrounding it!

Sidebar: Opening weekend Ti was all over Atlanta & surrounding areas buying movie goers tickets to the film. How lucky were they?

Will M.Night Shyamalan gain you back as a viewer?

Let's all not act as though The Sixth Sense was not one of the greatest suspense/thriller/horror movies of all time. There is no denying that. It seems as though each film that followed that blockbuster Shyamalan lost more and more fans. So join me as I take a breif second to review the "horror" films that followed in 5 words (or less):

Signs- Good but fell apart towards the end
The Village- What a waste of 2 hours
Lady In The Water- Horrible not Horror
The Happening- What just happened?

So... with that being said... I must say I am slightly excited about the Sept 17th release of his film Devil... Hopefully I won't be disappointed.

Fantasia = Homewrecker Alicia Keys= American Sweet Heart?

I'm sure we've all been slapped in the face with media coverage of former American Idol Fantasia Barrino's suicide attempt and bombarded with details on her affair with married T-mobile representative Antwuan Cook. Yet Alicia Keys & Swizz Beats escaped negative backlash in its entirety.  Keys' wedding was painted as a fairy tale, even though she allegedly did what many women other than Angelina Jolie consider to be the unthinkable: steal another woman's husband and get pregnant before the divorce is even final. Most women on the receiving end of that behavior would take the pregnancy as a great big open-handed slap to the face. Of course, we don't know if Keys "stole" Beatz from his wife -- no one knows what goes on in marriages -- but it appears that she was romantically involved with someone who was married. Beatz's wife, Mashonda, maintains that she was blindsided by the affair with Keys, who was even a guest at her baby shower.


I'm wondering why the mainstream media are so willing to let Keys off the hook for what many would call socially unacceptable behavior at best, and immoral behavior at worst, while taking Barrino to task for similar behavior. Is it that Keys is too pretty to be pummeled? Wrong is wrong! A Homewrecker is a homewrecker!

Keys the rapper, The Problem, The Beast. A drink of water.

Who is Keys? Well... remember the  infamous "Nicki Minaj Diss" over the Soulja-Boy beat She Got A Donk? Which got her 2 million views on YouTube? and then an official video on Worldstarhiphop.com? Ah.....NOW you remember! Well she is much more than a YouTube disser....And she doesnt take ANY sh*t nor does her "Spartan" followers! (Shouts out to them) Keys a Baltimore native is drink of water to a dying breed of female rappers. I remember the first time I heard the Nicki Minaj diss, I wasn't instantly impressed. It wasn't until I listened to her Freestyle on BET's  The Deal (on YouTube) and the majority of her lyrics were HISTORY based did I stop and say... "wow, I haven't heard material like this in ages" I was nowhere near disappointed when I listened to her Mixtape Infiltration, in which she rhymed over the beats of (Lil Wayne, Drake, NaS, Lloyd Banks & The Party Boyz to name a few)  It helps that Keys cites KRS-1 & Lauryn Hill (legends) as influences. It certainly show's in her lyrical delivery.

Now I will attempt to not badger Minaj too bad, i must admit her style is catchy as well as her delivery, but
I often wonder what makes Nicki Minaj's slueth of fans so angry? Is it that Keys is more talented and poses a threat? OR is it just sheer ignorance and disgust for opposition? I would hate to think it's a little of both, yet i've yet to read or hear a credible reason to why Keys catches flack. In the 80s, Keys style and approach would have been praised heavily. Don't believe it? Chronicle the career of Roxanne Shante and her claim to fame. Battle rap was pretty much came with territory. It seperated the talented from the lack there of. Yet here in 2010, the radio airwaves happen to be FLOODED with dance songs & less than memorable lyrical content. Even the veterans must dumb down their content to garner attention. My how the times have changed. I would like to know what MC Lyte & Queen Latifah and even Roxanna Shante herself feel about up and coming rapper Keys.  I think there was a statement made when Minaj refused to address Keys diss and later went out with subliminal shots. Is she afraid of being upstaged? I say put the two in a ring and let them freestyle it out. But wait..... Minaj doesnt really....um....freestyle! :-/  I think it's so cliche to say "i dont respond to disses" IF indeed you have talent and are content with that, then kill the competition. Jay-Z & Nas did it.... Foxy Brown & Lil Kim have been doing it for YEARS (too many actually) ...it's music! Since when do we limit expression in it?

Whatever the case may be, Keys is here and doesnt seem to be leaving anytime soon. So we should all prepare for a revolution!  By the fire she ignites in her flow there is certainly no beating so JOIN her in revamping a culture that has been dying for far too long! Spartan salute!

What you need to hear from Keys:
Hit Em'
Butterflies N- Bellies
Go Off
Hello Good Morning Freestyle
Sponsor

(The first of MANY Keys blogs!)

Drake's less than 4 page letter to Aaliyah

Dear Dana,

I’ve never lost a parent, a friend, or a lover but I will never forget this day for the rest of my life. I remember getting the news that you had passed and it connected with my heart like a clean shot from Muhammad Ali. I was crushed. Not only was I one of your biggest fans but I was truly in love with you. I loved the way you carried yourself, the way you dressed, the confidence with which you addressed passion and relationships in your music. I said to myself that even if we never met, I wanted a woman in my life just like you. I am pained that we will never get to connect now that music ended up being my career path. But you should know, we all listen to you everyday and we remain inspired and moved by all that you’ve given the world. I hope I make the right life choices so I can end up in heaven where I know you rest your head. I’ll continue to make music in your honor until the day we finally meet. Dinner’s on me!

Love you always and forever,

Drake

beautiful! Nothing smart to say, it's ok to be sensitive.....sometimes. #RIP Aaliyah!

Top Female Rappers EVER!

With all this fuss about Nicki Minaj & the supposed comeback of Lauryn Hill.... My mind begins to think in retrospect. Female rap once flourished with sexy, raw & talented female rappers! These are the ones who made my mental space! What about the LEGENDS? The founders? The talent? (and lack there of?)

Lauryn Hill 

Her freestyles are amazing! She's mos def in a classroom of her own! Can she make a comeback? Post for a later time

Mc Lyte
The originator! I mean why not be listed as the greatest? PLUS she was raw? Does she age at all?

Queen Lah
Rep'd HARD for the ladies and she came in the game RAW! Not taking nothing and quickly earned her place along side the men of the rap world

Rah Digga
Have your ever heard any of her freestyles? If not YOUTUBE them! Don't sleep!
Roxanne Shante
Who else do you know can challenge male hip hop rappers in their prime? All by her lonesome? WELL she most certainly did and did a GREAT job with it "The Real Roxanne"

Lady Luck
No mic is safe if she is nearby! She is a BEAST!

Lil Kim 
She changed the face of hip hop (keep your comments)..Some say in a bad way, others disagree. Whatever the case may be... She DID change the game! Her lyrics were raunchy, sexy, slutty, sleezy & gutter! But weren't the dudes?? She did it in heels and little to no clothing!

Lisa Left-Eye Lopes
Her verse in the song Freedom (from the Panther soundtrack), her song The Universal Quest, I Believe In Me and a host of other raps prove her position on this list!

Jean Grae
She was being called the new age Lauryn Hill! Does that raise you eye-brows enough?

Foxy Brown
Blah...Im not a fan but she has a nice flow. She would be aiight if she could stay out of jail and stop attacking people with foreign objects!

Eve
The blonde bombshell. The 1st Lady of the Ruff Ryders. EVE-E !!! I shouldn't have to say anything about her! Before she tried to get all sexy.... her rhymes were RUFF & hardcore (not like Kims) she held her own! What happened? She got to comfortable with someone elses make up collection & kept the same weave and went downhill! :( Come back to us Eve...the bald headed one!

Honorable Mentions:
Mia- X
Shawnna
Rasheeda

Do you think I missed any? State your opinion!

My First Blog.

Well, well, well! Thank you for joining me! I'm about to release doves & balloons to celebrate! I don't know WHERE to begin! But i promise to attempt to be consistent and update A LOT! I promise to TRY to use correct grammar & punctuation (rolls eyes) AND I promise to speak my mind ALL The Time!!!!!! I promise to speak on a plethora of things traditional & non-traditional! If you have any ideas please feel FREE to contact me! Questions? What you want me to speak on? Suggestions open to it all!  :)

With that being said..... Lets get this started!!!!